The Boss Babes Project believes that true happiness needs to come from within and relies on a strong connection to self. We cannot put the pressure on the people around us to “make” us happy but rather allow them to just bring happiness into our life. There is an incredible strength uncovered when you realise you have the ability to choose your own life and the person that you are and who you become.
“An incredible strength is uncovered when you realise you have the ability to choose your own life”
– The Boss Babes Project
Self connection comes from taking time to understand who you are and placing a high value towards investing into who you want to be. It is about making time to get to know yourself just as you would a new friend, ask yourself what you like, what you don’t like or what makes you happy. It is your responsibility to listen to your mind and body as they tell you. The most important thing is that you accept it and then you have the choice to act on it. Appreciate every part of your life and start to separate what is a blessing to your life and what is a lesson. Don’t be afraid to say goodbye to something or someone that doesn’t positively influence your life anymore, it is a way of closing the chapter on a part of your life that you don’t want to carry around anymore.
“Appreciate every part of your life and start to separate what is a blessing to your life and what is a lesson”
– The Boss Babes Project
First things first – You need to take responsibility for everything that has happened in your life until this point and accept the role that it played. Accepting doesn’t mean that you’re okay with it, it just means that you are ready to let go and not let the past hold you back. Take a deep breathe. Read the following Boss Babes Project Commitment aloud – say it, listen to it and believe it!
I will encourage and support
I will push myself because I know I am physically and mentally st rong I will show up
I will be proud of myself
I will keep going even when its hard
I will speak positive words about my self and others
I will believe in my abilities
I will not judge or compare
I will be grateful for my life and what I make of it
The Boss Babes Project has developed these five practises to strengthen the connection to self and learn to love yourself again. It’s a way to get to know who you are and make the time to decide who you want to be. The first challenge is uncovering how these practices will fit into your life and the way they will work best for you. There’s no one size fits all when it comes to learning who you are. Enjoy the journey and appreciate the lessons.
I am grateful for where I am and excited for where I am going Unknown
Practise 1: Throw out the Scales
You can not be defined by a number on the scales and your value is not measured by how much you weigh. Firstly, the number actually doesn’t mean anything, there are so many variables; number of toilet breaks, your menstrual cycle, water intake, when you last exercised, even the temperature – the list goes one. Start to value your self in what you offer to the world and to yourself, your strengths, your traits and definitely your weaknesses, and often more than not the vulnerabilities only make you more valuable. Don’t let the number on that screen control how you see your body or the basis that you evaluate your health. What you weigh on the scales says nothing about how your body is made or your health on the inside or out. Look after your body and yourself, treat yourself with respect in the way you speak, move and nourish your health, your body, mind and health will be a reflection of that.
Practise 2: Make regular time to enjoy your own time
Thats right – I said MAKE not FIND time. It is important to build a connection with yourself. Schedule in three times every week to spend time doing something you love, it can be for five mins or two hours whatever your schedule can manage. Start to think about what makes you really happy and something you love doing that relaxes you and lifts your mood. The most important part of this is that you actually show up every time, you make these times for yourself. Not only does this help you to connect back with yourself and create a clearer mental state, it also shows you that you are worth spending time with and your company is valued. You have made these appointments with yourself, so you need to commit and show up, give yourself the same respect you would with any other appointments. Go on – schedule three times in the next week for time with yourself. Be realistic with your time and spend it doing something that brings you back to yourself; it might be a run, enjoying a cup of tea or a wine or even just laying in the sun with a nice book.
Practise 3: Stop Comparing
Comparison, in any form, only brings negativity. You are either tearing yourself down for lacking something in comparison to someone else or tearing someone else down for lacking something in comparison to you, either way it hurts people and gives off the feeling that being enough is subject to what someone else has/is. We are all on a different journey and have our own reasons behind us for every choice we make. Don’t pretend you understand someone else’s outer luxuries when you haven’t seen behind the scenes. Remain focused on what you have and where you are, if you love it – great but don’t push it against anyone else, if you aren’t happy, change it – stop looking for someone else to blame and just do it. If you are always focusing on what isn’t working or what you don’t have, you’ll never be satisfied and you’ll always be looking over the fence. Start focusing on what you do have and what you are in control of, everything else is just a bonus, this is also a great way to accept your circumstances and remove the jealousy towards someone else.
Practise 4: Practice meditation and affirmations
Out of all the people you see each day you speak to yourself the most, make sure you are saying the right things and that the words you are using are there as a supportive friend and an inspiring voice. The words you speak are reflected through your reality and they change the way you see your world. You have the strength to decide your life and the first step is speaking in a way that reflects that life in the present tense. Affirmations are a way of saying your ideals in the present tense and initiating the manifestation of creating your ideal life. Make sure you work through our Affirmations worksheet to start creating your own, say them every morning when you first wake up to start your day in the mindset of your ideal life and say them every night to make sure you are going to bed ready to rest and feeling excited about the next day and creating your own reality.
There is no right or wrong way to mediate, it is a way of switching off from the outside world and focusing your thoughts on the present for the purposes of relaxation and connecting back with yourself. Find a way that works for you and make (again Make, not find) just a couple of minutes a day to schedule this in for yourself. It might take a little while to find the right way for you and thats okay, just really listen to your mind and body and connect with what works for you. It might be certain music, sitting in the sun, writing all of your thoughts down and getting them out of your mind, stretching or even slow deep breathing. Find out what works for you and make time for you.
Practise 5: Move your Body daily and in a way you enjoy
Exercise is not about pushing your body to your limits every day and it doesn’t have to be a chore. It is another way to encourage growth and development for your mind and body. Change your focus from exercise being a way to change your body for what it is lacking or what you don’t like about it but rather a way to challenge your self and continue to build your strength, both physically and mentally. Find a way of exercising that you enjoy, sometimes it is as simple as changing the time of day you exercise – some people love starting their morning with it whilst others prefer to end their day with movement. The most important thing is to find a way that you enjoy, it might be the gym, dance lessons, running around with your kids or dogs, walks or even Just Dance on the Wii.
Movement in any form is so important to make sure you are keeping your mind and body strong as well as giving your health the best opportunity to flourish and enjoying it is just a beautiful bonus!
Our five practises are here to give you a guidance towards your daily routine and the importance of the way you treat and look after yourself. Always remember that you are important and making an effort and time for yourself is deserved, give yourself the very best and don’t accept anything less.